Hallie LaRue Peters a Birth Story, Part 2

09/22/14

Do you know that I was embarrassed to announce my pregnancy this time? I didn't even tell Steve for several days.... do you want to know why? Both Em and Ry took such a long time to conceive and Hallie did not. Em took around 18 months with a miscarriage prior, possible loss of her twin as well (not confirmed, just speculated by the doctor). Ry took around 2 years, with a miscarriage before as well.... Hallie was conceived the very month I went off birth control, and I felt guilty. Very guilty. I know what it's like to have a hard time conceiving and then have other people's pregnancies thrown in your face, and I didn't want to do that to anyone. I knew people would know we got pregnant fast because of how soon it was after Ry was born, only a month after his first birthday. So, I thought it was important to get that out, because I actually experienced that guilt for most of the pregnancy.

Now onto the rest of the birth story.....

Today is the morning of my induction, I wake up feeling the same as I have for the last 2 weeks, but more pressure and actually a little bleeding. We got both kids bathed, Em ready and off to school on the bus. We had the kids bag packed for over a month now. Also, made arrangements for the bus driver to drop Emarie off at my step-dad's place (they're only a couple blocks away from us), we were going to drop Ry off there on our way to the hospital.

Finally, after relentlessly cleaning and trying to organize things to kill the time, the hospital finally called a little after 11:30 and told me to check-in at 12:45. So we finished up all the last minute prep, and got going, dropped Ry off and headed to the hospital. Once I was all dressed down and hooked up, a nurse checked me and I was surprised that I was nearly a 4, so labor was finally beginning anyway! They still started pectocin anyway just because things had taken so long to get to that point, and the plan was to have my doctor still come and break my water when he got a moment. I was glad about that, because it doesn't seem like anything really happens until my water breaks. And he came a couple hours later, and I still hadn't dilated any more, even on the pectocin, that was about 3:30. By 4:30 I was feeling a lot more pressure and strong contractions that were mainly in my hips. The nurse checked at that time and declared I was a 7, and thought the baby would be here within a half an hour.... Figured it was time to text Lacey to let her know she needed to be there soon if she was going to get pictures. She was still in Provo, but said she could head to American Fork as soon as she dropped off her husband. Less than 20 minutes later, I knew it was time, and the nurse confirmed I was fully dilated, and went to call Dr. Haskett, which they had a hard time getting a hold of him, the hardest part was trying not to push as I felt the urges. My doctor wasn't there, and my photographer was doing everything she could to make it in time, luckily it all worked out AGAIN! Just like with Ryker's birth. Lacey walked in about 3 minutes before my doctor finally made it. I pushed 4 times max and again for only a couple minutes and she was out by 5:02 pm. I knew she was bigger than my first two because I actually had pain pushing her out (even without an epidural, I didn't feel much pain pushing Ry out and I didn't feel Em at all), it still wasn't that bad, and for the first time ever, even with a baby a lot bigger than what I'm use to, I didn't tear at all, so no stitches. I think I can chalk that up to all the Evening Primrose Oil I'd been using in hopes of inducing labor myself! So, Dr. Haskett was in the delivery room less than 5 minutes! I guess he raved about me in the office the next day and said I was his easiest delivery ever.... at least that's what his associate told me when she came to check on me the next day.

Hallie came out so fast that she was quite swollen and had some bruising and petechia, she still has small hints of this even 3 weeks later, mostly in her eyes. Most of the comments from the doctors and nurses were about her full head of long, black hair! In fact, when I stated that her head was harder to push out than my other two, Dr. Haskett said, "It must be all the hair!".... I remember the nurse who took her to wipe her down said, "Oh she has a dimple!" I was SOooo excited about that!! It is one of my favorite features about myself and I have always hoped one of my kids would inherit them.... even if she only has one, I was so happy! Dr. Haskett thought it was funny I was so excited about that and said, "I figured you'd be most excited about all the hair?".... I told him, "Eh, my babies always have hair!" Hahaha.

She came out screaming her entrance and was the first of my kids to not have the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, so Steve actually was asked for the first time ever if he wanted to cut it, which of course he declined! I'm still surprised he stays in the room for the birth of our babies, he gets really queasy and doesn't like the thought of the pain it must cause.... funny, huh?! My labors with both my girls have been extremely painful, but birthing them is not.... nothing about Ry's labor and delivery were very painful.

I got a lot of skin to skin time with Hallie and she took to breastfeeding great and right away! I couldn't decide who she looked like, but Steve thought she looked more like Emarie than Ryker, and I started to see that too. She mostly gets comments on her hair and her lips. It's debatable where those lips came from since Steve and I both have pretty full lips, but her hair definitely came from me since I had a full head of black hair when I was first born as well. Either way, we both agreed that she is beautiful, and BIG! She came out weighing in at a whopping 8 lbs 10 oz beating her brother by a pound and her sister by 2 pounds! Quite long again at 20.5 inches (which is what Ry was as well, but a pound less). Her complexion was pretty dark coming out like her brother's, so I was pretty sure she'd be showing some high bilirubins like he did as well, and I was right, but I'll get to that later.

Her first visitor other than Lacey, was my mom that came just an hour two after her arrival. Other than that we didn't have any more visitors until the next day. We had a perfect first night together (Steve went home so that Em and Ry would be able to sleep in their own beds). She breastfed every 2-3 hours through the night, and snuggled with me. They gave me two vaccines that night, a flu shot on my right arm, and per a strong suggestion from them since my asthma was reported to be pretty bad during my pregnancy, a pneumonia vaccine. I had never had one of these before, and also have actually never had pneumonia, but I didn't think too much of it. I regretted getting it though!

Our next day was nice, Steve came and brought the other kids to meet their new little sister the next morning, and we had a few other visitors throughout the day (Steve's parents, grandpa Mitch ((my step-father)), my grandma and grandpa Wilde and my cousin Alexis). That night is when things started to go south. I had been feeling great postpartum (I usually do feel pretty well since I have such difficult pregnancies, I usually feel so much better when I'm not pregnant), actually I felt better than ever since I didn't have any stitches, so really just had the postpartum contractions to deal with, but even they were not very bad and didn't last nearly as long as they usually do. I actually wasn't taking any narcotics, just the ibuprofen. But that all changed when I woke at 2 am on the 24th..... I had the most searing pain in my arm where I'd got the pneumonia vaccine, I could barely move my arm, couldn't put any weight on it (to pull myself up in the bed), and honestly the pain was liken to a broken bone. I called the nurse and when she came in, I let her know that something wasn't right. So, she checked it and said, "it does look awful red, they can become irritated, I'll grab you a heat pack".... Irritated??! No, my flu shot area was irritated, this was WAY worse! And yeah, the heat pack didn't help much and I was rating my pain at 9 at this point. The nurse knew then that something was off, because she could see in my chart that I hadn't rated my pain above a 4 since having my baby. So she called the doctor and they suggested it was probably an allergic reaction and ordered benadryl. I still wasn't terribly satisfied with this, but being as I'd never had a reaction to a vaccine before, I didn't know what to expect. The benadryl knocked me out though, so I fell asleep until Hallie woke up again at 5 am, that's when I took this picture....

                                                

It started with two bright red, thumbprint sized welts and the pain was unimaginable. I knew when I saw it that it was infected. But still no one would listen to me. Every time the nurses came in, I was rating my pain and saying it was only coming from my arm. I kept saying I thought it was infected, they gave me more benadryl, even sent in someone from the pharmacy to train me in reactions and what to avoid. I told her that I knew it wasn't a reaction, she told me to keep an eye on it. By the time I was getting ready to be discharged that afternoon, the two little welts had morphed into a large red patch, but still they gave me more benadryl, then sent me home.

By that night, I spiked a high fever, tremors, was delirious and exhibiting other flu-like symptoms, so Steve took me to the ER where I was diagnosed with a serious case of cellulitis. I was given an IV and an infusion of an antibiotic, as well as started an oral antibiotic and was sent home even though the doctor said he would normally admit me under the circumstances, but with all the sickness they had and likely my immune system was compromised when it was doing all it could to fight this infection, he didn't think it would be safe for me there. So I was given the script for the orals, then given instructions on going to outpatient IV therapy.

                                 

We took Hallie's newborn pictures up in Salt Lake the next day since we already had the studio reserved. I didn't feel well all that day even after having the two different antibiotics in my system. I went to my first outpatient infusion that night and after getting home, I felt horrible, and that's when Steve noticed how much the redness had spread on my arm. It was also incredibly swollen at this point.

                                            

I was so exhausted, I ended up falling asleep, but woke up in the middle of the night with such pain in my arm and now feeling it in my side and back, so I went back to the ER at 4 am. They added another oral and another infusion. He told me that these were the strongest antibiotics I could be on, so if they didn't work, he wasn't sure what the next step would be, I became pretty scared at this point. So I went to IV therapy morning and night for up to 3 hours at a time for a total of 8 days of treatment. It took until I took my very last oral antibiotic for the pain to completely go away, but my skin is still darkened (bruise-like) where the infection was the worst, it took the longest to get out of my elbow. But I finally feel better from it all, though it was one of the hardest things medically I've gone through, and definitely wasn't fun dealing with it right after I had a baby.

                                             

                                                          My picc line I had for 8 days

All of this pretty much made Hallie completely shy away from breastfeeding, so once again I'm exclusively pumping and she is getting bottled breastmilk. So, once again my supply is ridiculously abundant and I'm making way more than she's eating. So far I haven't had any signs of infection, but that could be that I still have a lot of antibiotics in my system.... but I hope not. I've already begun donating since I'm putting more than 40 ounces in the freezer on top of what she's eating everyday. She is getting her lip tie revised next week, and I'm hoping to go back to lactation and hopefully get her back to breastfeeding again.

And yes, she had pretty high elevated bilirubin levels, actually got above the 20 mark, but thankfully our pediatrician took pity on our situation (when I was getting treatment), and she never had to go under the lights even. We just did our best to make sure she was getting enough food (and it really helped when I just gave up and let her have bottles for every feeding) and keeping her near the window and even taking her outside once and awhile. Her complexion is still quite dark though, and I know Ry's had completely corrected itself at this point, so I don't know if it is part of her coloring now.... so, we shall see.

But that's it, now for the good part.... here's her birth video (G rated again!), pictures were all by Steve and Lacey Lynn.


   

The Nitty-Gritty of Our Hard Summer

*warning, long post ahead*

So.... if you're on Facebook or read the last few posts, you can probably gather that we've had a lot going on this summer. I mentioned in this post that Em would be facing a rather hard summer.... and the reason for that was after a follow-up from her latest sleep study (her daddy went with her for the first time and they had fun, as you can see)

But the follow-up was rather grim, the results were terrible and some of the worst apnea he'd seen, and this was after a floppy voice box repair done last October. This was after a sleep endoscopy that was performed last August and they were sure the floppy voice box repair would fix her problems and prolong their need to do a facial reconstruction (you can read more about that here). 

So a sedated MRI was scheduled, and re-scheduled..... and then rescheduled two more times! This was after a cold and then croup, and forgetfulness. So it didn't happen until August, when initially it was supposed to happen in June.

Around this same time we also were dreading another procedure. Remember how it was mentioned that since Ryker came, Em had been pulling her tube out a lot??..... well, we decided to do something about that, and talked with Dr. O'Gorman about some non balloon port tubes (the mickey button that Em has uses a balloon to keep it in place.... so once it is inserted into her belly, you use a syringe of water and place it in the port to fill the balloon up). There is benefits and downsides to both kinds of buttons, so we researched a lot, and decided that a non balloon was worth a shot. The biggest thing with the non balloons, is they are really hard to pull out accidentally, but if they do come out, it is a lot more painful, and they can only be replaced at the hospital (the balloon ones we can replace ourselves, and they are not without pain to come out or put in, but from the sounds of it, the non balloons are a lot more painful, but again, harder to come out). So Em had a non balloon placed back in April, and for the first day or so, it worked great! But not so much after that, and it began leaking like crazy. And I'm talking really leaking, like she wasn't getting any food at all, and was going through around 10 outfit changes a day! She had never had a problem with leaking, so I called them of course, by this point it was the weekend, so I had to call the hospital and get the on-call gastro. He said since they had to go up in size, she was probably just a bit stretched out and it would take awhile for her to close-off again and not to worry. But when I told him her skin looked terrible, he said maybe we should get in to see the wound team at Primary. So that is what we did, and luckily they squeezed us in that week. Their thought was that the button was too long. They had used the same length as her Mickey had been, but since there is not a balloon to pull it tight up against the stomach (it had a flat disc to keep it in), it was too long. Unfortunately we were already having issues with the insurance covering more buttons because Em had gone through so many mickeys when they were getting pulled out so often (insurance only covers 4 a year, and by April we had already gone well over that), so they didn't think the insurance would cover a change so quickly.... even though, the blame should be on the Dr for putting the wrong size in in the first place! So they gave us some thicker pads to try and get it more taught, and of course many, many creams! But this is when it was first noticed..... a dark spot right near her stoma that they were unsure as to what it was. They wanted us to see her dermatologist about that, and they worked their magic to get her in the next week (Dr. Vanderhooft usually has a 4-6 month waiting list!).... so of course that worried me a little. Things really went south though before we even made it to the next week! So Sunday we headed for the ER..... our reason for this, is that we believe Em had had very little food or drink for 2 weeks at this point, and this is what her stomach looked like

Yeah, I was worried she was getting cellulitis. At the Primary ER, they could all agree on one thing, that button needed to come out.... we had not been able to keep from leaking at all. They couldn't do it then and there though, because they knew it would need to be done under anesthesia, and they neither had a surgeon that could do it, nor an anesthesiologist that felt comfortable with Em's airway. So they made room for her on Monday's schedule at 6 am, and she finally got that sucker out! 

It was easy to see right away what the problem had been, the thing was broken!!! INSIDE her stomach! So not only did they have to take out what they could from the outside.... they also had to go in and remove the fragments from the inside! That dang thing was probably broken from the moment they put it in.... because how it works is, they put it in and then use a tool to crank open the disc, and it probably got broken as they were cranking it.... I felt so bad for my little girl :( 

But things got much better after she went back to a balloon port, and we decided that we would just do our best to keep it in from now on. So we got to the dermatologist later that week and found out that Em had a staph infection in her skin, so they put her on antibiotics for that.... but still the best dermatologist at primary didn't know what to make of that dark spot either, so she thought it would be best for us to see a surgeon and get it surgically removed and biopsied..... yup, panicking at this point! I made no hesitation in making an immediate appointment with Dr. Downey (this is the surgeon that first put Emarie's g-tube in when she was 3 months old). They were able to fit us right in because apparently they had already received a fax from Dr. Vanderhooft.... great :/ And at that appointment, the C word was used..... I could hardly believe my ears..... Cancer? Really? Could this girl possibly have that when she deals with so much else?? I was downright angry! This was most certainly not fair!! He said he wanted to remove and biopsy it as soon as he possibly could..... he could do it the next day at Utah Valley..... too bad that was no go! There is not an anesthesiologist that will touch her outside of Primary. So he asked his nurse when the next time he would be at Primary would be, and it was the following week, but she said they were full.... he looked at the schedule and said, "bump him, this is more important to get done."...... WTH??! You can imagine how this is all making me feel like everything is collapsing around me and I can't breath or focus on anything..... the world stopped spinning, everything disappeared.... all I could see.... hear.... feel.... was my baby might have cancer. 

And of course this happened smack dab at the same time that she got croup and whatever else! So that awful procedure had to be rescheduled again and again as well.... but we finally faced it in July, and then let the facebook community know what was going on with this post:

Sorry for the picture overload, but we had a hard time choosing (and you can probably see why!). Our cute little "Super Girl" would truly appreciate your thoughts and prayers this week as she has some big deciding procedures (one on Wednesday and the other on Friday). I have hesitated to say what these are before now because it increases my stress over it.... but on Wednesday this sweet girl will undergo her 20th surgery for suspicions of cancer, please I am asking to not be bombarded with questions on this now, since I am already freaking out. The procedure on Friday will be a sedated MRI to see if she is going to need that dreaded facial reconstruction much sooner in her future than was previously anticipated. We really would like a good outcome from both of these procedures as you can imagine, thanks in advance my wonderful friends and family

So the sedated MRI didn't end up happening that week because we forgot to turn off her feeding at midnight.... out of well over 21 anesthetic procedures, that is the first time we've ever done that.... so although I was really frustrated, mostly because of the previous procedure though.... I had to hand it to myself, that that is not bad! So she had the MRI in August.... and sorry I know this is getting really long, but bear with me! 

Here are some pictures from the biopsy, and yes she wore her super hero cape into the OR! 

And well it took over two weeks, but we finally got the results that amazingly (even with 95% assurity that the results would be malignant) the mass was benign!!!!! So that was one hurdle! 

This was the very spot and moment where we received the news! And doesn't Ry just look too cool for school in this picture! 

After her MRI. She usually has a hard time waking after these types of procedures because they use an anesthesia that induces a more natural sleep. 

But fast-forward to August when she had her MRI, then a couple weeks later, her follow-up, where come to find out, they would like to try another tongue reduction and they think this could offset the need for a facial reconstruction for a few years *big sigh of relief*...... until I get a very detailed (with pictures) description of what a real tongue reduction is, and it sounds horrible. It is a very tricky and potentially dangerous procedure, with a significant chance it might not even help. She will have to be intubated, spend a few days in the PICU, and have a possibility of up to 2 weeks total in the hospital, but knowing my little girl, it could even be longer. All this coupled with the fact it might not even do what they are hoping it will..... well you could imagine my hesitancy, but I went ahead and set a (tentative in my mind) date for October, cried the whole way home and then got my big girl pants on and set straight to work when we got home. I researched and couldn't find much, so then I did the next best thing (actually probably the best thing and what I should've done first) and consulted the true experts.... the parents..... the special needs parents to be more specific. So I posted on the Ch18 FB page and two other general special needs parenting pages. No one had ever heard of this procedure, but all agreed it sounded scary, and there seemed to be a consensus that I should seek another opinion (which I was already planning), but thankfully the Utah Kids page was able to give me a few options of doctors that we could get a second opinion from. I also asked Em's (and Ry's) wonderful pediatrician at Ry's 9 month appointment and he too recommended a doctor that a lot of other parents had recommended. So I made an appointment and luckily they were able to squeeze us in October 5th, a mere 3 days before the suspected surgery date.

Sadly, the world collapsed again a few days later when I got a call from Dr. Muntz's surgery scheduler saying that they could not get the pre-authorization from the insurance because she was told our insurance had terminated. *Panic* "That has to be a mistake" I tell her..... though I'm sure she can hear in my voice that I'm not so sure, but I told her I would check on it and give her a call back. But my worry was completely confirmed when I went to the pharmacy later that day to try and pick up Em's vital Singulair and was told the same thing by the pharmacist.... we no longer had insurance. And this is the point that I had a very public panic attack/meltdown and had to leave without getting that precious medication. And the next day is when the letter finally came saying that our coverage actually ended at the end of July, which means all those procedures that happened in August were not actually covered :/ You can probably gather why this may be a big deal, but one little thing is Em can certainly wrack up nearly $10,000 in medical expenses monthly between her medical formula, her feeding tube supplies, her medications and therapy and clinical visits that happen on a monthly basis. And this is a good month, that doesn't include sickness, or surgeries, or hospital stays that come with both of those often. So we cannot be without insurance, but what do we do? There's Medicaid, which we have been denied for at least 3 other times, but it's pretty much the only hope we've got. So I have been working like crazy to get that process going yet again, but still have a lot more to do, and it can take awhile to get approval, even though it will retroact to when our insurance ended at the end of July. Thankfully because the amazing friends (really family) and network we have, we will be taken care of as far as formula and supplies go for a bit.... did I mention how much I love the Utah Kids group?? As well as certain Ch18 family that have come to our aid as well. Aside from the Singulair, thankfully I had refilled a lot of 3 month supplies of Em's medications before this all happened, so we should be ok there for a bit too.

I won't think about what will happen if we don't get approved for Medicaid, hopefully CHIP will be the backup, and the only backup we'll need. We cannot get on private insurance because all of us (save for Ryker) have pre-existing conditions. Our only options before were group plans. Sadly Steve's work had to stop offering insurance in 2010 (thanks mostly to us most likely, because after Em was born, United Healthcare raised the companies premiums 25% each period, and there came a point where the company could no longer afford it for everyone), but they pay into his salary what they would've put toward insurance. So when our coverage ended through Steve's work, we had to go with my work's group plan, and since I wasn't a contracted employee, we had to pay the full premium, which wasn't cheap (but $1,500 is better than $10,000!), so that is what we've been doing since then, and one of the major reasons we were forced to sell our home and be renters/squatters since then ;) But of course I quit my job with the school back in November when our sweet little Ryker was born, so we knew our coverage would eventually have to end, we just thought we still had time.... stupid, I know!

But we have had so many people offer to help us in this crisis mode! I have learned some good connections thanks to more advice from the wonderful parents in the Utah Kids group (very lucky to have found that group!). I am also in contact with someone to get Em on the DSPD wait-list.... sadly all of these programs that are offered are so hard for the people that really need them to get them. I had a caseworker help me with the paperwork for Medicaid, which I remember was a nightmare the last few times I've done it, and I don't know how people are able to get it so easy when they make it nearly impossible to apply! If it weren't for this caseworker's help, I am sure it would have not gotten done as quickly, nor as efficiently. She has also taken sympathy on our situation and thinks we have a real shot, so keeps us in your thoughts and prayers if you so wish.

After all that, I'm sure you'll be surprised to know that the summer hasn't been all bad! We've been swimming, and jumping on the tramp, and playing, and vacationing in Park City (still hoping to get a post done about that, but again, don't hold your breath!).

Playing in the backyard with the cheapo pirate pool I got for $6

And then we decided to get a "real" pool when we saw pictures of our friends The Wolfs in a pool like this, I knew Em had to have one! We got it from Amazon BTW.

And this is when we went to Cowabunga Bay for their "Autism Night". They rented out the whole park and all special needs families were invited to come, it was only $5 a person, and that included admission to the park and dinner, as well as other goodies they were giving out to everyone. Too bad it started to storm right at the time we were going, and it was a bit cold! But thankfully the water was warm and the kids didn't seem to mind too much! Both of them went down some big slides with mommy and daddy's help :) 

And then there was this amazing thing, where we got to share our miracle girl with the world! Thanks to the help of Joanna Rudnick, Kartemquin films, Rick Guidotti and NBC's Rock Center. This was amazing! Click the picture below to be taken to the article and clip of the profile they did on the amazing Rick, that features a very cute, 18 month old Em! 

So that was our summer in a nut shell, and also I have started a new job that I can work from home :) I am working on the customer assistance team for the car dealership Ken Garff as a call grader. I listen in to the recorded calls and grade the ones that are sales related, and determine other things for the ones that are not sales related. Basically my job is to make sure the customers that call in are well taken care of. I have to send a lot of emails out to others in the dealership, and listen to a lot of funny things! Just a fair warning, when you hear that familiar saying that, "This call may be monitored for quality control purposes.".... just know that the entire call is recorded.... when you're talking with the person, when you're holding and even before the call is even answered! And someone IS listening and just might have grounds to laugh at you ;) 

New School, Loads of New Progress!

Emarie has been attending preschool for the last 3 years in Provo district where I worked. But as of November when sweet little Ryker was born, I have quit working there. It got really hard to take her and pick her up each day, especially considering she was only there about 3 hours a day. So we talked seriously about placing her in Apline district where we are now living. This was an extremely hard decision to come to because I know everyone at the school and in the kindergarten class she would have gone to in Provo, including the children, who were the same she'd been going to school for the last 3 years. I know how they do their IEP's, they have all known my girls since before she was born, they love her..... It was really, really hard to even think about her going anywhere else.... But we decided we'd just check things out and found out she could go to one of 3 schools:

Dan Peterson- an all inclusive school in American Fork, meaning it is a school just for special needs children and all the way up to 22 year olds. 

Hillcrest- a typical elementary school that has self contained classrooms.

Orem Elementary- same as above ^

We have had a few incidents that have persuaded us to think about placing Emarie in an all inclusive school. She never had any bad experiences at her preschool even though she was around typical children there. But that is part of something I have always known, children will see disabled children no differently if they grow up and are around them regularly. So that is one strong point to keeping her in a regular ed school.... but does that always benefit her? 

We went school shopping well before we decided anything

 Her backpack was her favorite thing we got at Target that day, and she hugged it all through the store and all the way home! And she still hugs it on the way to and from school everyday! Though she had a bit of a tough time deciding between this one and Minnie Mouse, I'm pretty sure she's confident in her decision with Rapunzel ;) 

And here she is will all of her school stuff.... she actually picked out her first day outfit when we were in Park City at the end of July (don't hold your breath, but still hoping to do a post about that!)

So we decided to make an appointment to just go look at Dan Peterson, and after that we were completely sold! They have a sensory room that Em absolutely loved! They also had an all adaptive playground that is all wheelchair accessible and she loved that too. 

 My two cute kids enjoying their swings! FYI it was another 100 degree day when we went, so we stayed out there as long as we could stand.... but it wasn't very long (Utah has had the hottest summer in history, with over 20 days of record breaking heat, and July held more days over 100 degrees than under :P)

The principal there was someone I could see myself being friends with and she had taken the time to find out about Emarie from the preschool before we came that day, which I don't know many principals that would do that with their busy schedules! They also have 3 full-time nurses there everyday, which put me at a lot more ease knowing I wouldn't have to worry so much about her allergies and asthma, nor her feedings. 

So it was a snap decision.... our tour was Wednesday, we did her IEP and special healthcare plan on Monday, and she started for the first day of school on Tuesday (the 20th of August). Here are some pictures of her first day :)

The traditional front porch shot, she was eager to get going, so wasn't very cooperative for these

But thanks for the subtle smile Em :) 

This is once we got there, and again she was eager to go inside, so she wasn't having it! I love this outfit she picked out at the Carter's outlet in Park City

This is once we got in her classroom, she was a little nervous, but that really didn't last long!

This was her teacher trying to ease her nerves by asking her to help her set up their next activity.

So they want her to be there all day and she will be in full-swing with her services, did I mention they have a pool for PT??! But since she was only use to being at school 3 hours a time and 4 days a week, I thought it best to try and ease her into it.... So the first week she started at 12:30, which sadly was only one day because she woke up the next day with the stomach flu and her little brother got hit hard with strep and hand, foot and mouth disease! We still aren't sure how or where he got so sick, but there'll be more on that later.... 

So the next week was when she finally had her second day and she started going at 11:30. And next week she'll be starting at 10:30, and the week after that will be full days and hopefully she will be on the bus both ways by then. I am still having to take her and pick her up at this point because we didn't get her info in enough time for her to be on the bus right away, but I'm told they're working on it, so hopefully after labor day sometime that week she might start going home on the bus. 

Her second day (which was the next Monday), her teacher told me that she used verbal communication and said the phrase "red star" during a shape game they played. This was not a repeat of something she'd heard, this was her telling them which one she wanted..... So this was not only saying clear words (that all the adults in the room understood mind you!), but it was knowing what color red is, and what shape a star is! I know my girl is smart, but unfortunately not many are privy to see that..... it took her until year 3 to say a single word in preschool! She signed, pointed and communicated in other ways before that, but 3 years before she spoke a real word in school..... day 2 at this new school and she said something I've never even heard her say! More solidarity that we made the right decision.... but hold on until you see what day 3 brought....

This is something her teacher showed me on her third day of school. She handed it to me and said, "Obviously she has been worked with and taught how to write her name, but we never saw any info on that in her IEP....." I was blown away as I said, "You mean..... she did this by herself??" And then there was shock on her face..... I told her she has written her name with lots and lots of help (hand over hand type help), and then we both had tears in our eyes. This is proudly being displayed on the fridge! 

So I'm sure you will be seeing much more amazing things from this girl, I am really excited about this year! 

Emarie's Preschool Graduation

After 3 years of preschool, my sweet girl finally graduated. It was a bittersweet day and I was flooded with emotions, not just because my little girl is growing up, but also I was thinking a lot about all the things she would be facing this summer.... I couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy as I heard other parents talk of plans of vacations, trips to the water and amusement parks, camping and other fun summer activities. And thanks to this missing DNA of Em's we are facing a lot of horrors this summer. I will probably finally get into all that in a coming post. 

So Em and her cute little class performed a couple of songs, and then they were each presented with a graduation cap and certificate. Mommy bought her a special graduation balloon and lei that I surprised her with when I came. Daddy was able to come too and Em was over the moon about that!

Here's some pictures of the day

 Singing songs

 Walking back after songs and then walking back after getting her "diploma" and cap

 All her family that was there that day

Her teachers, top L, Miss Molly, Top R, Miss Kelly and Bottom, Miss Brenda

She had a great year and accomplished more in her last year of preschool than the entire 2 years before that! 

Here's just a fun little picture I put together to show her first year of preschool at 3 years old, to her last year of preschool at 5 years.

Sadly this is the day Em started to head south with her health and got sicker than I believe she has ever been in her life (which is really saying something!), which caused her to miss the very last day of school, and put her in the ER later that week where we would find out she had croup, which also made it so we had to reschedule her two vital procedures (part of the horror of the summer we are looking at).  It took her quite awhile, but she is finally getting back to herself and we now have the procedures rescheduled for the middle of July. 

Happy Mother's Day! 3+1=4

So, once again there are a lot of posts on the back burner.... but this one needed to come first :) But the next few posts will be devoted to family visits (my aunt, uncle and cousins and Steve's sister Amber), Deak's Run which was today and fabulous! And a few more sequels to this one probably.... 

Anyway, I'm sure you're all getting sick of my slideshows by now, but I bet this is one you'll want to see ;) This is the slideshow I made for my mom for Mother's Day

Enjoy!

*Best if viewed in 720p and full screen

So... I guess we are "van people" now!

Other than our Ch18 peeps, the general consensus was, "never took you as van people!".... "Especially with only one kid!"

And well, I'd have to agree! I still remember distinctly, even up into the first few years of marriage I was swearing up and down that I would never own a van! 

But, that was of course before a sweet little girl graced my life! Once those we showed were able to see what we are using the van for, it's easy to see we should have gotten it a long time ago! 

Picking it up in Salt Lake

Our 2011 Town & Country

 Here's the big kicker! It fits her stroller, walker and wheelchair!

 We love this part! It has a 28 G hard drive to store music and pictures! Also a back-up cam!!

Steve decided it would be a good idea since we traded in both cars, to get a bike to ride to and from work. So right after we picked up the van, we headed straight to Sports Authority to get him a bike and helmet. And he has been such a sport and done great the last week! 

 This was him riding home yesterday

Em trying on daddy's helmet :) 

Em's favorite things about the new van-

-Finally having the space that she so craved!

-She loves, loves, loves having her own air vent right above her head! I often catch her in the built-in peek mirror just holding her hands up to it, so funny!

-She also loves the automatic sliding doors (so do we!), she thinks it just amazing that they shut "all by themselves"!

So, there you have it! We're "van people" now..... and proud of it! 

What do I not have to be thankful for??

*Play song "Kind and Generous" with this post

Alrighty this was the last day of November, so I was determined to finish this post before it was over, since it was what this month was all about! Now I'm not sure how long ago this tradition was started, but I guess I started noticing it last year but did not participate until this year. That tradition is for many people to post something they are thankful for each day in November on Facebook. Actually, I wasn't planning to do it this time because for the first week, as I looked over everyone's posts, all I could do was think that everyone else had much more to be thankful for than me..... stupid, right? 

So, at first I just tried, somewhat begrudgingly to post because I felt like this would help me out of my slump of: we lost our house, we are worried about insurance/money... everything! Having to supposedly quit my job (which is really mostly a joke since I am there just as much as when I was actually teaching!)... anyway the list could really go on and on... hence why I needed out of this sort of thinking! And actually I was surprised at how the thankfulness just kept coming, in fact my hardest thing was narrowing it down to just one thing a day (which most of the time I failed at... miserably!). Anyway, the whole experience was so refreshing and really wonderful and I invite everyone to do it next year... or all year long!

But anyway, onto our Thanksgiving week (and yes it was a whole week because it was chuck full of food, family and a whole lot of chaos! But it was great!

First, Steve's aunt Ellen and her family came into town from California, which we haven't seen them in a few years and their youngest, Sabrina is just a couple weeks older than Em :) Yeah, Steve's dad comes from a family of 8 kids, and him being the oldest and Ellen the youngest means his grandkids and her kids end up being similar ages, very confusing but fun all the same! Since they were going to be here surrounded with family, they decided to have their son baptized here and we were lucky enough to attend and that was on Sunday. 

*And I apologize for the quality of these pictures because our DSLR camera is broken and is at the sony place being fixed :( So all of these pictures came from our basic digital camera or Em's iPhone (I know I said I wasn't going to post anymore pictures from her iPhone on the blog, but I think I'm getting the hang of it!)

 The crew while we were skyping with Steve's uncle who couldn't make it to Utah

 Steve's cousin Jenny (Bowen) and her daughter Laci are back from Korea! Her husband will be joining them soon!

 Em has liked playing with pianos lately and actually creates melody when she does *mom sees piano lessons in her near future!* She graced us all with her talent that evening

 Steve's aunt Debbie and her husband Bob (Bowens), Ellen (Jones), Matt Bowen who just returned from his mission, and aunt Karen (McCash)

 Some of the kids goofing around. That's Anni (Buresh) and Sabrina (Jones) and the crazy boys, Levi (Buresh) and the newly baptized Daniel (Jones)!

They had a lot of fun together!

The day before Thanksgiving was full of preparation (dinner for close to 60 people takes a lot of that!), and a short break to get some much needed (since September) blood work for Em done. She was happy, sweet and energetic through the whole process! Love my brave girl!

Thanksgiving Day

Only got a picture of the sweet cousins (that are only four days apart) at Steve's parents house, because like I said there was a lot going on there!

At the Andrews'

This picture is really poor quality (usually the iPhone does a pretty good job, so this must have been my fault because the ones Steve took are much better!) But these are the boy cousins that were there: Brett Andrews, Connor Wilde (my baby brother), Ryan Andrews (my mom's twin brother's son), Bryan Wilde being himself (my older brother), and the freakishly tall (for this family) Chase Adams!

And the girl cousins in attendance: the freakishly tall (for this family) me, Alexis Adams Holt (one of my "twin" cousins, we're 2 months apart), Sarah Andrews, and Cassidy Adams. Love these girls!

Black Friday

Steve and I are not really big fans of the hustle and bustle of the "Black Friday" happenings! But we did want to do something fun with our girl, so we went to see the new Muppets movie and we all really enjoyed it!

But after the movie, we figured we were right at the mall and Costco, so it couldn't hurt to check some things out... and boy am I glad we did! We got all the perks of the sales, but the crowds had significantly cooled down after 7 pm!

This is $40 worth of clothes (normal prices would have equaled around $200!), totally worth it!

Sadly we didn't have the luck we would have hoped at Costco, but Em still enjoyed herself :)

On Saturday, we decided to brave the retail world again and headed up to a place that I have been dreaming of going to ever since I left Germany over 8 1/2 years ago!

And yeah, that would be H&M up at the Fashion Place Mall, finally here in Utah! If you don't know what it is, it is much like the European Gap but with better prices :)

After that, we met my family at PF Changs for dinner to celebrate my mom and her twin brother Kenneth's birthdays (they don't celebrate them together very often!)

Here's Em laughing it up playing some mean percussion with the chopsticks! 

And here's Em modeling her new outfit from H&M before we headed up to Riverton to see the former Elder Bowen give his homecoming talk from his recent mission

FYI, that dress was $12 and that was the regular price! See told you!

So wow, we had a great Thanksgiving (Sunday to Sunday) and our hearts are full with so much we have to be grateful for! We have a great majority of our Christmas shopping done (frugally might I add!). So now that I've actually started in on recognizing our blessings, they just keep coming!

Like this..

These are two "nice" checks from the past two years of income taxes, that the state of Utah withheld because of a "discrepancy" from a side business we had for a bit that never made any money. Enough for a new camera so that we'll have one for Christmas (and don't worry we're selling the old one once we get it back), as well as a possible to trip to San Antonio in the summer of 2012 (I'm sure you Ch18 folks know what this means to us!)

Now if only I was blessed enough to get up our dang Christmas decorations!... or at the very least, the tree, because then I'd have a reason to wrap all the presents I'm excited about!