But, life will go on......

Things have been hard lately, to say the least. I'll start off with the fact that, I have been noticing for some time now that things are not quite right with Emarie's hips and feet. Her PT and I noticed the other day that there is definitely a discrepancy with the length of her legs. This, I know she wasn't born with, so it could only come from two things: her hips, or her spine. The worst of course being the latter. So, I reluctantly put off making the appointment, until I could no longer avoid it. I knew what the answer would be at this appointment, but does that make it any easier to hear? Short answer, no!

I love Dr. Stotts to no end! He is amazingly compassionate and understanding when it comes to Emarie. His fascination and curiosity about her conditions, do not bother me in the least bit, because he is so sweet and tactful about it. Example, asking me if it's ok if he brings in a student to see her most uniquely shaped feet. My likeness and respect grew even more for him today, when the look of concern I saw on his face (he seriously looked close to tears when delivering the information) when he told me she would need yet another surgery. He told me, he'd never seen any child's hips regress like Emarie's have in the last year. It's no wonder she doesn't like to stand when her hips are popping in and out of joint. He assured me that this is not putting her in pain, just probably very weird and uncomfortable. It is good to get an answer, but it is making me wonder....... I definitely see the benefit of getting this done while she's young, but on the latter, I keep thinking, enough is enough. This child has had 9 surgeries in her 2 short years, I just can't imagine putting her through more. But, I do see that this would be better suited now, than say 5 years down the road. And I want to help my daughter in every way possible.

Here's the hard parts, what this surgery will entail (because it will be bigger, and more elaborate than anything she's had done already):

First, it will include at least a week in the hospital. And, I'm going to be realistic, knowing my daughter, we could be looking at more like 10 days.

She will be in a "Spika" cast for about 4 weeks. For those of you that don't know what this is, it is a full pelvic cast. That means, it starts slightly below the breast bone, goes to just above the knee. There will be a rectangular sized hole for her diaper to go up inside (visualize that as you will!) The hardest part though, is how still she will have to be for those 4 weeks. It makes me cringe to think of how uncomfortable she will be, especially in the dead heat of July.

The worst yet, is Dr. Stotts said this would probably be the most painful surgery she'll ever have. The worst pain I've ever seen her in was the night after her feet surgery, he was sorry to say that this would be worse. I cried for a good 2 hours after digesting this. There is nothing worse than seeing my baby in pain, and I mean NOTHING!! I just hope you will all keep me in your prayers that I can be strong for her, because I just don't know what I'm going to do.

On a happier note, here is a recent picture of Emarie in one of the new skirts I recently bought her. This is the first time I have bought her new spring/summer clothes since the year she was born!

And yes that is really big attitude from a very little girl!

And Steve and I got to go to a Jazz game with his sister Amber and her husband Kevin

We had a lot of fun! Thanks Amber and Kevin (and Kristal and Uli, who couldn't come, so that's who's tickets we got!)